I was delighted to be invited to speak about one of my greatest passions, Authentic Networking, at the launch of the new Athena Chertsey and Ottershaw Network at Foxhills last week.
Here’s a taster of the talk.
I’ve been lucky enough to be in business for myself in various guises for 10 years. I’m a huge fan of networking, both formally and informally. I’ve been curiously modelling out what really works for the book I’m currently writing. What is the difference, in my experience, that makes the difference between good networking, and really successful networking?
I believe what has made networking so successful for me and my business over the years (before I even knew face book, twitter and social networking sites existed) is what I call Authentic Networking.
Authentic networking is an attitude that facilitates magic, the magic that is created when two people connect in a holistic, meaningful and valuable way.
Social and business networks, super efficient search engines and satellite technology can take us (virtually!) anywhere in the world at the touch of a button. We can connect with potentially anyone at a moment’s notice and are bombarded with options and choices of how to interact.
I embrace this move to make the world a smaller place, particularly as some of my dearest friends live across the globe, but there is a danger inherent in this often faceless form of interaction. We are at risk, particularly in business, of losing the personal touch, of losing the heart of business. I really do believe that at the root of all this frantic online social activity is a real desire to make a real connection. For those connections to be successful for you in business, you have to build trust. Rapport can be had in an instant and perhaps even via online platforms but trust takes time. Perhaps not always as long as you might think as there are several factors that go some way to increasing the speed at which trust is earned.
(For some further helpful insights you might want to check out “The Speed of Trust” by Stephen M.R Covey)
I want to talk about two different approaches to networking that might help to highlight the authentic networking principles. Neither is particularly good or bad but it’s useful, I find, to understand the differences and implications of both so you can make an informed choice when deciding upon your networking strategy.
The QUANTITY (breadth) approach
- High numbers of contacts
- Likely to be across multiple platforms (online and off)
- Attending lots of different events across a wide area
- Likely to be more impersonal and superficial contact
- Easily forgotten
- Trust requires more frequent contact and takes longer
- Useful for growing a list
- Likely to produce 1 hit wonders
- Useful when you need to have wide reach – (charities, campaigns, book sales, events promotion etc)
The QUALITY (depth) approach
- Fewer contacts deeper relationships
- Could be multiple platforms, likely to include phone calls and meetings
- Attending fewer events, meeting same contacts repeatedly
- Trust takes less time to build (particularly following meaningful interactions)
- Takes time (Meetings take longer than tweetings)
- Creates higher customer loyalty
- Increased referral rate
- It’s Personal. Your network are more likely to share your hopes, dreams, challenges, aspirations
When we are busy doing business and time is at a premium it might not be possible to have the quality ‘deep and meaningful’s’ with everyone, and nor should you necessarily, but ignore it at your peril. If you only ever take a quantity driven approach, its hard work, takes a great deal of time and effort and you have to be consistent to benefit on an ongoing basis. You also run the risk of being perceived as superficial, not a particularly helpful trait in business.
You could just opt for a ‘quality’ approach, but that’s potentially missing opportunities too, anyone who’s ever tried to fill a workshop or plug a charity event in a short space of time knows that it’s often easier when you have a larger list to leverage.
So perhaps take a synergistic approach, it seems to work for me. You can grow your list and create meaningful interactions that build trust.
One way of doing this is to apply the Golden Rules of Authentic Networking whenever and wherever you network. Whether it’s to thousands of people in an instant on twitter or a few ladies over lunch, it’s about the attitude with which you approach your networking that makes it authentic.
Be your authentic self. Give yourself the persmission and the freedom to be yourself. Don’t try to be anyone else or wear too formal a mask; your own brand is vital for the success of our business. Let your personality shine through.
Seek first to understand (Steven Covey). In networking it’s not about us! Avoid at all costs the hard sell, that doesn’t mean don’t make the most of an opportunity when it presents but don’t make the conversation all about you and your business. There is no substitute for genuine interest when you are networking. Give the other person your full attention and make them feel special, they deserve it!
Add genuine value. Look for creative ways to support, add value and make a positive difference to those in your network. In correspondence/newsletters etc, aim to add value more often than selling/promoting (80/20rule).
Be relevant and appropriate. Spamming your network we all know is a no-no but there’s more to consider than that. For example, different people will want contact in different ways and at different times. Some people love to chat, others find the phone daunting, find a medium that works for them, don’t just stick to something because it’s your favourite way of connecting. Not everyone loves twitter! When you do make contact aim to make it something useful and relevant to your network.
Follow your instincts. It’s not realistic to build life-long deep and meaningful relationships with every single person you meet at every networking event, particularly if you get out and about as often as I do. When deciding who to take the extra time to follow up with, have a face to face meeting with etc, follow your gut and your heart as much as your head. Those you ‘click’ with are likely to be easier to develop relationships with and you’ll really enjoy adding value for them.
Create meaningful interactions. In my experience the speed of trust increases, the more meaningful an interaction. An interaction becomes more meaningful when you get past the chit chat and into the realm of hopes, dreams, challenges and purpose. Don’t be afraid to share your passions and your dreams, actively support your network through their challenges. Find unique ways to connect that make it more meaningful, memorable and inspiring. I love networking over lunch and coffee but I also love nature and am really at my best in green spaces so I created Netwalking, networking in nature and I love it. It helps create a truly different dynamic and people relax and reveal their authentic selves so rapport and trust is almost effortless. Consider unusual venues for your 121’s, almost anything goes, enjoy being creative. What ways can you find to make your interactions more meaningful?
There is plenty more to the art of authentic networking (to be revealed in my book soon enough) but for now I wish you every continued success in your ventures and hope our paths cross again soon.
